Posts Tagged ‘Humor’

Cajun Fly Swatter

Posted: March 11, 2014 in Jokes
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Marie walked into de kitchen & saw Boudreaux with a fly killer (Swatter).

She axe him, “Any Luck”?

He said, “Yah, tree males and two females”.

Marie axed, “Mais chere, how can ya tell em apart”?

Boudreaux said, “Mais dats easy…tree were on dat beer can, and two were on de telephome”.

Blonde Boudreaux

Posted: March 11, 2014 in Jokes
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Blonde B0udreaux

In the aftermath of Katrina, an Irishman, a Mexican and Blonde Boodro were doing construction work on scaffolding on the 20th floor of a building.

They were eating lunch and the Irishman said, ‘Corned beef and  cabbage! If I get corned beef and cabbage one more time for lunch, I’m going to jump off this building.’

The Mexican opened his lunch box and exclaimed, ‘Burritos again! If I get burritos one more time I’m going to jump off, too.’

Boodro opened his lunch and said, ‘ Bologna again! If Ah get a bologna sandwich one more time, Ah’m jumping too.’

The next day, the Irishman opened his lunch box, saw corned beef and cabbage, and jumped to his death.
The Mexican opened his lunch, saw a burrito, and jumped, too.
Then Blonde Boodro opened his lunch, saw the bologna and jumped to  his death as well.

All three bodies were laid out at the same funeral home.

At the funeral, the Irishman’s wife was weeping. She said, ‘If  I’d known how really tired he was of corned beef and cabbage, I never would have given it to him again!’

The Mexican’s wife also wept and said, ‘I could have given him tacos or enchiladas! I didn’t realize he hated burritos so much.’

(Oh this is GOOD!!)

Everyone turned and stared at the Blonde Boo’s wife as she said, ‘Mais, don’t look at me. Dat idiot made his own lunch.’

No Dogs Allowed

Posted: November 21, 2013 in Jokes
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A man goes into a bar with his dog. He goes up to the bar and asks for a drink.

The bartender says “You can’t bring that dog in here!” The guy, without missing a beat, says “This is my seeing-eye dog.”

“Oh man,” the bartender says, “I’m sorry, here, the first one’s on me.” The man takes his drink and goes to a table near the door.

Another guy walks into the bar with a Chihuahua. The first guys sees him, stops him and says “You can’t bring that dog in here unless you tell him it’s a seeing-eye dog.”

The second man graciously thanks the first man and continues to the bar. He asks for a drink. The bartender says “Hey, you can’t bring that dog in here!”

The second man replies “This is my seeing-eye dog.” The bartender says, “No, I don’t think so. They do not have Chihuahuas as seeing-eye dogs.”

The man pauses for a half-second and replies “What??! They gave me a Chihuahua??!”

My preacher told this joke in church today and I thought it was worthy of posting. Enjoy and laugh!

There was a pilot who knew his plane was going down so he left his cockpit seat for a parachute. He told the others,”There are four parachutes and five of you. You guys will have to figure out who get’s them. See ya!” He jumps.

So the doctor says,”I save and heal people, so I need a parachute.” He takes his chute and jumps.

The lawyer says,”I advise people, so I need a parachute.” He takes his chute and jumps.

The Harvard Graduate Students says,”I am the smartest one on the plane, so I need a parachute.” He takes his chute and jumps.

Finally, the old man says,”Young man, I have lived my life right, I have faith, and I know where I am going. You take the last chute since your only 16 and live life.”

The 16-year-old says,”There is not need for you to die sir. There are chutes for both of us.”

The old man says,”Well, how did that happen?”

The 16-year-old boy says,”The Harvard graduate student jumped out of the plane with my backpack.”