Posts Tagged ‘parenting’

Giving failing students a passing grade

Posted: October 28, 2013 in Education
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In almost all public schools across America we are suffering from grade inflation or changing grades. Often, teachers find out after the fact that administrators have passed their failing students on, or the teachers are ordered to inflate grades to maintain employment. It is dirty secret. A large portion of American students are learning absolutely nothing, except the latest new game on their cell phone.

Schools are also stating that more students than ever are prepared for college. If we are passing them all on, how are they more prepared? 57% of college freshmen not prepared for college because they have been passed along. http://news.yahoo.com/blogs/sideshow/sat-scores-continue-decline–57-percent-of-incoming-freshmen-not-ready-for-college-001618038.html

We enroll a huge amount of students to college so that colleges collect the first year freshmen tuition from the impoverished students scholarships only to fail them out. It keeps money rolling, professors working, and a colleges in business. It makes high schools look great, because they claim,”We are sending students to college more than ever.”

Students are allowed to tell teachers things like,”Fuck you bitch! I don’t have to do shit.”, and often these students are warehoused, disrupting, making the teachers day miserable, and other students miserable, only so the school can collect federal dollars to keep a school open. These same students are often given scholarships. I know you are asking yourself,”How?” I ask myself the same question.

America’s education system is in deep trouble because it is plagued by corrupt people who are lying. This should be on the front of every newspaper in American along with the evening news. Many of the leaders are over-paid so they will stay quiet about the truth.

Here are a few examples, but if you research on your own, you will see there are thousands of examples. It’s like a modern standard.

http://baltimore.cbslocal.com/2013/07/24/grades-changed-to-pass-failing-students-at-baltimore-city-middle-school/

http://gothamschools.org/2009/10/28/bronx-high-school-changed-grades-to-graduate-more-students/

http://www.dispatch.com/content/stories/local/2013/01/20/grades-were-changed-too.html

http://www.dispatch.com/content/stories/local/2013/04/14/remaking-the-grade.html

http://www.news-press.com/article/20131015/NEWS0104/310150033/Lee-school-grades-changed-after-issue-exams?nclick_check=1

Struggling To Keep Work and Life Balanced?

Posted: October 23, 2013 in Family
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I came across this article (below in italics) and felt it had many great points for those who are single, have families, and are of any religion. Even though the article is geared to those who have a small-business and family, many of the points apply to all of us.

Personally, family life can be balanced quite well, when one decides that their priorities fall in this order:

Faith, family, and then work.

Unfortunately, for most people today their order looks a bit like this: Work, Work, Work, Work, and somewhere way down the line is family, and quite often no faith at all. No surprise we have a 50% divorce rate, broken families, and youth gone wild is it? The wealthy families are often living no different from poor families when it comes to family life either. Wipe out the material aspect, and just look at the family aspect, and you will understand my previous statement.

All that people are frustrated by financially and politically can be managed by re-setting priorities. The world will fix and heal itself, if we all just refocus on what is important in life. It sounds simple, but for many they just don’t have the character, or will to stand up and fight. They give in to man’s ways and spin in the cycle of unhappiness.

So here is the article. What do you think?

How to Keep Your Small Business Without Losing Your Family by Craig Ford

Unfortunately, work often competes with family.

Ideally, the two would work together, but …

The small business owner always feels this tension. The traits that make a small business person successful in the work place include strong work ethic, creativity, and determination. The book Overcoming the Dark Side of Leadership: How to Become an Effective Leader by Confronting Potential Failures says your greatest assets are also your greatest liabilities. Your leadership strength is also the thing that is most likely to lead to your downfall.

The small business owner who invests 80 hours a week in his or her business – because of strong focus and determination – is also the most likely to burn-out and neglect his or her family.

So how do you keep your family without losing your business?

The 30 Second Commute : The Ultimate Guide to Starting and Operating a Home-Based Business has a list of things for the home-based business owner to consider:

Involve your family in the business plan developing stages – be clear about what will change, might change, and won’t change.

Communicate openly with your spouse – know the answers to the following questions:

What are your expectations during this new phase? – be with the kids during the day? home on weekends?

Are you on the same page financially?

What is your greatest fear as you enter this new endeavor?

What will the family need to sacrifice, for how long?

How do we know the plan is not working? Have an exit strategy in place.

Communicate clearly with the children – what are their new boundaries.

When spouses work together:

Consider this carefully as few spouses can spend such extended hours together and their marriage be blessed.

The game plan
Before starting any new business venture I believe a husband and wife should sit down together and clearly discuss the family implications of a new business. Here’s how:

On a piece of paper write your average weekly, daily, or monthly activities. Then ask, “How will this activity change if I take on this business?” Beside each activity indicate if it will change, might change, or won’t change.

As a couple, ask each other if you are willing to sacrifice those items that will change.

Never Go in it Alone
In the book Moms Needs, Dads Needs: Keeping Romance Alive Even After the Kids Arrive Willard F. Harley,Jr. suggests the following agreement:

Never do anything without an enthusiastic agreement between you and your spouse.

This is a rule I often break and the reality is that when I break this rule the results have not been a blessing to our marriage. Most of us operate with the following rule:

As long as you won’t be ‘too mad’, I think I’ll do it.

However, when running a small business a lot will be demanded of your family and your marriage. If you are not both enthusiastic about the choice, that decision will put more and more pressure on your relationship.

The Exit Strategy
In the post on How to Evaluate Risk When Starting a Small Business we talked about the importance of having a financial exit plan. What if things do not work out according to plan?

You must also have a family motivated exit plan.

What if the business starts demanding more time? What if the business is not on track in terms of growth? While one spouse might be willing to make a longer commitment to the business, both must agree when enough is enough and it is time to move on to something else.

I believe there is a broken correlation between those who are highly successful in small business and those who have fantastic families. In other words, it is hard to have both – hard, but not impossible.

Remember the Important Role of Prayer
While God is already with us, prayer is an intentional invitation for God to join you in the midst of your discussions.

In prayer, barriers are removed and anger released.

Commit to spending time in prayer over major decisions. A flesh act is one where we proceed with a plan without first consulting God. Even in business we walk by the Spirit.

Remember, there are some things that should never be sacrificed.

What good is it for a man to gain the whole world, yet forfeit his soul? (Mark 8:36 NIV)

In the same way I would ask – what good is it if you have a successful small business, but lose your family?How I categorize gains and losses, I would actually call this a loss.

Read more: http://www.moneyhelpforchristians.com/

Woman are more likely to blame their partners……

Posted: August 20, 2013 in Family, Health
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After reading this article, I found it enlightening because it is correct in so many ways. I did not live years ago, but something tells me that when men spent the majority of their day working and providing for their family, and woman spent the day taking pride in raising their children, cooking wonderful dinners, keeping the house in order, and doing traditional motherly work, their minds had less time to wonder, worry, compare, and want all the time.

With today’s society, a woman can have so many insecurities and baggage with no outlet for it. With the T.V. shows, a woman can formulate her values based on what she thinks is cool by what is presented to her. She can also get her values from her friends. The wrong group of females can take a woman down the wrong path A.S.A.P.  A woman can believe that she should not work, do anything within the home, and her life is to shop, relax, and run around all day, while she searches for a man to tolerate or provide for her. If he doesn’t, it is his fault. Wrong men! That is a misguided woman. Whoa to the man with a woman like that, but unfortunately there are a lot of them out there. On the flip side, there is the career woman who thinks that because she is just as ballsy as a man, and she brings home the bacon, she has to do nothing. You really cannot have a career man and woman in the house that work all the time if there are children, unless you want someone else to be the parent. If you have no children, it can amount to a power struggle.

So men, do not tolerate your woman trying to blame you for her problems. Her baggage and insecurities are for her to own and deal with. You can lend and ear, talk, and perhaps make a suggestion men, but at the end of the day, what is in her mind is her problem. She has to fix it. Unfortunately, a woman can be very manipulative. She will try to make you feel guilty and work your mind into believing you are to blame. If it becomes an annoyance for you that is unbearable, let her go. Otherwise, she will just be poison in your veins.

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-2331561/Women-likely-blame-partners-failings-relationship—money-exes-alcohol-cause-conflict.html

Help! It’s right here.

Posted: July 22, 2013 in Education, Family, Health, More about me
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A lot of times I am asked about my life and how I accomplish things. “Help! I hear.” Sometimes, I am the one asking for,”Help!”

So today, I decided to do a post about the things that benefit me, and I know can benefit others. These ten things can change your life.

Help! It’s right here.

1. Banks- Banks have a main goal that is to make money and earn interest off their assets. Their goal is really not the customer even though they must pretend that they love      you to death. Banks have high priority for those who are ultra-wealthy and low priority for most of society. They often see the lower-income earners as burdens even though they are glad to have what little money you own to help their bottom line, which is to make money. So with that said, don’t pay the banks! Pay yourself! How do you pay yourself? Invest in stocks, mutual funds, and bonds that pay you interest(money). Avoid credit cards and borrowing! If you don’t have the money, then don’t buy it! Do not give the banks extra money, so that you can have a depreciating (losing money) asset. Think assets (what pads or lines your pocket), not liabilities (things that take away from your money).

2. Insurers- Insurers protect you from liability(responsibility to pay for loss) and protect the things your own(assets). Many times, we do not have the necessary cash flow to pay for huge losses. With that said, buy insurance on everything of value, that you cannot replace with the cash you have on hand. I believe in insuring everything possible.Insurance can be expensive, but the price is small when you have a disaster.

3. Retail purchases and autos- Purchasing anything new is like throwing money away in the trash. Why? Almost anything new loses extreme cash value. Purchase clothes, shoes, goods, and autos used so that someone else can lose the cash value and take the big depreciation hit for you. In return, you are benefiting your assets and helping the environment by recycling. The money saved can be invested so that you are paying yourself.

4. Groceries- Purchase fruits and vegetables that are in season so that you get the best value. Buy dry goods and other items in bulk if you have storage capacity to save money. Buy organic foods when possible to avoid chemically laden food products. Natural foods will save your retirement money for you and not prescription drugs to maintain your health. Avoid most cleaning products because they often do not work as stated and they are hazardous. One can clean and disinfect almost everything with bleach, lemon juice, vinegar, and soap.

5. Entertainment-  Always look for early season bargains on passes to museums, zoos, water parks, amusement parks, etc. The passes allow you to go to a place as much as you want without paying for a ticket every visit. The passes usually pay for themselves within one or two visits. For movies, hit the matinees and save up to 25% per ticket. If you want to take it further, pack your own food. This is always healthier and a huge savings.

6. Health- Avoid all drugs (prescription and illegal) as much as possible. The body hates drugs especially your stomach, liver, and kidneys. Avoid alcohol as much as possible and limit to no more than one drink a day maximum. Eat as many plant-based foods as you want, love and use fresh garlic, and limit consumption of animal products. Diets high in vegetables, grains, and fruits help you to have the power to enjoy life in your senior years and save your retirement money for trips and not prescription pills. At my age, I am watching friends far apart and break down, because they never took the lifestyle choice of being healthy serious. Protect your skin from the sun with sunscreen and clothing for that beautiful youthful look. Drink plenty of water and limit sugary drinks. I would say to avoid all man-made food additives as much as possible especially monosodium glutamate (makes you gain weight)  and high fructose corn syrup (diabetes link).

7. Donate- Donate what you do not need to charity organizations or others. Donate time to help make a difference in the environment or someones life. Donating time, money, and goods are great for the soul and health of the body. Another added benefit is the government recognizes the importance of donating and often many things can be used as a tax write off.

8. Religion- Prescribe to a faith and stick to its teachings as much as possible. I say as much as possible, because it is unreal to expect perfection. Of course, I am bias to Jesus Christ and Christianity, because Jesus washes me clean even though I am a sinner. Many religions base salvation on good works, but you can never have enough good works. It is impossible! We can never be perfect and Jesus knows this. A benefit of religion is added years to your life which is backed by research. It also gives one and improved state of mind and greater outlook on life.

9. Human relations- Listen and watch a person to know their heart and state of mind. Know who they hang around. Unfortunately, not everyone is nice or good. If something is great and another tells you it is bad, then you must realize that person is bad. If committing a certain act is bad and another tries to convince you it is o.k. that person is bad. Great people work to bring you up, help you, and show you good things. Bad people are the opposite because they tear you down, do not help you or your life, and they will show you in the worst way how not to be successful. A rattlesnake has a pattern and rattle for a reason. To warn you of it’s danger! Humans also have patterns and characteristics.

10. Education- I cannot state it enough! Read, study, and learn all that you can about as many topics as you can. Be a renaissance man/woman!

Reflections on Parental Guidance- A Sermon

Posted: May 19, 2013 in Family, Religion
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Today my pastor, Dr. Ed Young, did a sermon on parental guidance. He really hit the nail on the head when he said,”America is in trouble.” He started out by discussing two families that he has known over 30 years that were neighbors, same economic background, same houses, churches, parties, and social circles. He stated that sociologists would agree that almost everything about them was pretty similar. The problem is one family had complete disaster(disobedience, crime, decadence) in the household and the other complete happiness (story book family and progression). The question is,”How can that happen?”

It happens when there is a lack of family values and modeling in the home.

So one might ask,”What is a value?” A value is a life principle. Of course people will try to defeat you when you state biblical knowledge, but you can counter them by asking, “Where do you get your values? What is the source?”

Today we look on the news and see heinous and horrendous crimes one after the other against woman, children, men, and just about all over the world. In America, 48% of our teachers leave teaching. That’s almost half. We have around 135,000 kids taking guns or some sort of weapon daily to school. Over 24% of kids are scared to go to the restroom for fear of being bullied or accosted at school. We have lost our moral compass. We are not teaching boys to men or girls to be women. What we have is a failure of parenting! We treat the disease and not the problem.

Let’s take a tour of values and how we got to where we are today.

From the 1st century until the 18th century man based his life and law on transcendent values and natural law. Men looked up to the heavens for guidance. Starting in the Enlightenment period, men heard the ideas of Kant and Jean- Jacques Rousseau. Rousseau taught to look within your heart for guidance. Kant taught to look inside your mind for guidance. Forget God and look to yourself. This idea is prominent in education today. We allow children to follow their passions, emotions, hearts, and minds without guidance. Now Rousseau did have children, but all four were born by a slave and he disowned all of them. Some parent he was yes? So why do we look towards his philosophical thinking and teach it today? Why are his philosophies more prominent than those of Jesus?

Then we have Friedrich Nietzsche who came along later to teach perfectionism, self-will, and calling your own shots. You don’t need anyone to tell you what to do. You can rule your own life. You dominate the weak and control. Freidrich Nietzsche states,” The strong have the right to rule anyway they see fit.”

It’s no surprise that Adolf Hitler adopted this thinking. The sad part is this philosophy is alive and well in education today.

“What’s in the classroom today, will be in the home tomorrow.” ~ Dr. Ed Young

So you see the darkness that prevails today, that most people want to close their minds to and ignore, began during the Enlightenment period. Parents have not absorbed this fact. The scale is tipping to negative and dark territory as time passes.

During the 60’s and 70’s, the heat was turned up, and we had the Haight-Ashbury’s Love-In. Free love, free sex, free food, drugs, and the turning away from values. These people are ruling today. Do you see the direction and why we are where we are at now? John Lennon was bigger than the world at the time and everyone loved his music. Lennon was embraced with great fervor. Is John Lennon really that great and an authority on parenting? Let’s take a look at what Julian Lennon said about his father.

“I know that Dad was an idol to millions who grew up loving his music and his ideals. But to me he wasn’t a musician or a peace icon, he was the father I loved and who let me down in so many ways. After the age of five, when my parents separated, I saw him only a handful of times, and when I did he was often remote and intimidating. I grew up longing for more contact with him but felt rejected and unimportant in his life.
… … While Dad was fast becoming one of the wealthiest men in his field, Mum and I had very little and she was going out to work to support us. Dad was about peace and love, but could not show it to the ones who were supposedly most important to him. ~Julian Lennon

Without question, the greatest victim of Lennon’s character failings was his oldest son, Julian. John Lennon clearly resented the young boy whose conception had forced him into a marriage he didn’t want and trapped him in a domestic routine he was too immature and narcissistic to sustain. Simply, John Lennon made up his own life – exaggerating, embellishing, and outright lying when it suited him to do so.  People tend to see Lennon as some sort of divine guru of peace and love because of his political activities in the early 1970s. The reality is John Lennon was politically clueless and only took photos with a bunch of radical groups.
John offered no parental guidance. So why do we look at him as some great hero when he is a failure in regards to parental guidance?

In a UCLA teen survey that was ten years apart, the first in 1997 and the second in 2007 we see the stark change in teen values over a ten-year period. The teens were asked what their top values were.

In 1997: community, tradition, acceptance, image, and benevolence.

In 2007: fame, achievement, image, success, and popularity.

So we can see there is less caring about others and more about the “ME.”

Do you see the progression and how we are failing as a society? It all starts at home. Fathers and mothers are failing because they give no parental guidance. Fathers are especially weak because they are not leading their houses. The woman is not the leader. The man is the leader. Men step up!

The funny part about Kant, Rousseau, and Nietzsche and the whole enlightenment is that God talked about their ideals in Jeremiah. There ideas were nothing new and God spoke of the problems those ideas bring in the following verses:

Jeremiah 17:9-14

New International Version (NIV)

 

9 The heart is deceitful above all things
    and beyond cure.
    Who can understand it?

 

10 “I the Lord search the heart
    and examine the mind,
to reward each person according to their conduct,
    according to what their deeds deserve.”

 

11 Like a partridge that hatches eggs it did not lay
    are those who gain riches by unjust means.
When their lives are half gone, their riches will desert them,
    and in the end they will prove to be fools.

 

12 A glorious throne, exalted from the beginning,
    is the place of our sanctuary.
13 Lord, you are the hope of Israel;
    all who forsake you will be put to shame.
Those who turn away from you will be written in the dust
    because they have forsaken the Lord,
    the spring of living water.

14 Heal me, Lord, and I will be healed;
    save me and I will be saved,
    for you are the one I praise.

God searches the heart and the mind we just need to follow him and his teachings. We need to look up instead of looking to our own hearts and minds.

There are men and women who seek to be corporate icons and heroes making all the money that they can, but at the end of their lives they often state,”I wish I could go back and be a better parent and raise my children.” IT’S TO LATE!!!!

What AMERICA needs so desperately right now is men and woman who are FAMILY ORIENTED and not CORPORATE CLONES.

Matthew 16:25-27

New International Version (NIV)

25 For whoever wants to save their life[a] will lose it, but whoever loses their life for me will find it. 26 What good will it be for someone to gain the whole world, yet forfeit their soul? Or what can anyone give in exchange for their soul? 27 For the Son of Man is going to come in his Father’s glory with his angels, and then he will reward each person according to what they have done.

The best parental guidance one can give is time to your child by listening, learning, working with them, and loving them. Do not let their friends or outsiders be their source of knowledge. Many important people today have the worst advice in the word because their minds are reprobate.

Don’t lose your children because you choose to live for the world. You will gain nothing!